Junior composition
Text-Analysis Paper
Face your Fate, Acne!
First Draft
Second Draft
Red -- errors, problems
Green color --omit
Blue --suggestions; comments
View the Ad
Name:Vicky Yen
Number:485200019

First Draft

Recently, the products -the mask cleans our faces and remove acne especially on the nose are quite popular.  we can see the commercials on TV or on the magazine everyday.  There are many kinds and companies in the market.  It is difficult for us to decide which one is better and effective when buying.  My sister bought one before but we didn't think it worked and cleaned completely enough.  We felt very depressed and almost gave up until we saw one ad from the magazine one day. 

 
In these days, my sister and I are interested in this kind of products again because we think our faces really need to be cleaned up that our noses are like the strawberry that many spots are on it.  We took out the magazines and discussed which ad was more persuasive.  The one attracts us a lot is SOFNON-GAIA.  It is fresh and interesting that one side of a girl's face occupies most part of this ad; on her forehead is a small excavator toy.  The girl looks at the excavator with smile and hope that she seems very confident to clean out the acne on her face.  For us buyers, this cute smile convinces us and makes us being willing to give our faces to it.  The girl stands for us buyers and her skin shows how efficient and helpful GAIA is to convince us.  In this ad, the excavator means this product- GAIA will do a good job to remove the dirty on the face, as the excavator will clean the waste on the ground.  It is a symbol of cleaning completely.  As to the
background, the green color means the nature field.  I think green symbolized the life and energy.  In my opinion, the use of green as the background is to make us feel comfortable and fresh.  Besides, green stands for the hope that ad provides mostly to us consumers.
My sister and I felt very satisfied with this picture and we felt more impressed after seeing its slogan “ Face to your fate, acne!  No matter where you hide, we will cope with you.”  It uses a speaking tone to the acne full of strength and self-confidence.  To the girls, the acne on the face is troublesome and our enemy; we want our facial skin looked as clean as possible.  Therefore, this slogan is powerful and strong enough to persuade us to buy the product.  After appreciating the creative picture and the slogan, we began to notice the statement at the end part of the ad.  In accordance to the slogan, the beginning is some declaration GAIA makes to the acne.  It says that the acne shouldn't be on the face and should be drove out.  GAIA will treat them mildly but firmly and introduce us the way it works.  Judging from this statement, my sister and I felt even more hopeful for our skin.  I think this statement makes people trust this product because we are afraid to hurt our skin after using it to remove the acne but it makes us believe that it deal with it with no harm.  We don't want to get rid of the acne but hurt the skin.  Besides, this part is interesting that it uses personalization to talk to the acne that they should face to it fate and surrender obediently.  After reading this explanation and seeing the enlarged photo beside it, we admire how easy, convenient, useful and wonderful GAIA is.  The best of all is that there shows a set of the product and the price of it on the right final part of this ad.  When I see a product I like on the ad, I will like to know the price; sometimes I will give up if I don't know how much the product costs.  GAIA is not cheap but it is not too expensive, either.  I think it is quite an acceptable price for the young girls.
In my opinion, this ad is quite successful by its image of the picture and the slogan as well as the statement on it.  It gives us promise to get rid of all the dirty and acne on the face.  It also provides us hope and confidence to cope with the annoying acne.  Needless to say, my sister and I are persuaded again.  Maybe we will be cheated again but now we are really convinced and feel hopeful with our strawberry-nose by this ad.  I repeat several times in my mind with confidence and smile that “face to your fate, acne…”just like what the girl does on this ad.

Face your fate, acne!
Second Draft






     People nowadays are very concerned about the problems of the skin. Facial mask that cleans our face and removes acne is quite popular recently.  We can see the commercials on TV or on the magazine everyday.  There are many kinds and companies in the market.  It is difficult for us to decide which one is better and effective when buying.  My sister bought one before but we didn't think it worked.  We felt very depressed and almost gave up until we saw one ad in a magazine one day which slogan and the image of the excavator make us feel hopeful.  The slogan is so powerful that we want to read the ad carefully.
     In these days, my sister and I are interested in this kind of products again because we think our faces really need to be cleaned up.  Our noses are like the strawberry that has many little spots on.  We took out the magazines and discussed which ad was more persuasive.  The one attracts us a lot is SOFNON-GAIA.  It is fresh and interesting that one side of a girl's face occupies most part of this ad; on her forehead is a small excavator toy.  The girl looks at the excavator with smile and hope that she seems very confident to clean out the acne on her face.  For us buyers, this cute smile convinces us and makes us being willing to give our faces to it.  "Look at her smooth and beautiful facial skin, that's just what I want!" I thought with jealousy.  The fact that she has no acne on her face is one function in this ad; the girl stands for us buyers and her skin shows how efficient and helpful GAIA is.  To get rid of the acne is our purpose.  In this ad, the excavator means this product- GAIA will do a good job to remove the dirty on the face, as the excavator will clean the waste on the ground.  It is a symbol of cleaning completely.  As to the background, the green color means a sign of nature, or life and energy.  In my opinion, the use of green as the background is to make us feel comfortable and fresh.  Besides, green stands for the hope that ad provides mostly to us consumers.
     My sister and I felt very satisfied with this picture and we felt more impressed after seeing its slogan “ Face to your fate, acne!  No matter where you hide, we will cope with you.”  It uses a speaking tone to the acne full of strength and self-confidence.  To the girls, the acne on the face is troublesome and our enemy; we want our facial skin looked as clean as possible.  Therefore, this slogan is powerful and strong enough to persuade us to buy the product.  It gives people a lot of expectations and dreams.
     After appreciating the creative picture and the slogan, we began to notice the statement at the end part of the ad.  In accordance to the slogan, the beginning is some declaration GAIA makes to the acne.  It says that the acne shouldn't be on the face and should be drove out.  GAIA will treat them mildly but firmly.  Judging from this statement, my sister and I felt even more hopeful for our skin.  I think this statement makes people trust this product because we are afraid to hurt our skin after using it to remove the acne but it makes us believe that it deal with it with no harm.  We don't want to get rid of the acne but hurt the skin.  Besides, this part is interesting that it personifies the mask to talk to the acne that they should face to it fate and surrender obediently.  After reading this explanation and seeing the enlarged photo beside it, we admire how easy, convenient, useful and wonderful GAIA is.
     The best of all is that there shows a set of the product and the price of it on the right final part of this ad.  When I see a product I like on the ad, I will like to know the price; sometimes I will give up if I don't know how much the product costs.  GAIA is not cheap but it is not too expensive, either.  I think it is quite an acceptable price for the young girls.  I think girls about my age will be interested in this product and I am especially attractive by the ad.
     In my opinion, this ad is quite successful in its image of the picture and the slogan as well as the statement on it.  This ad gives us promise to get rid of all the dirty and acne on the face; also, the slogan provides us hope and confidence to cope with the annoying acne.  Needless to say, my sister and I are persuaded again.  Maybe we will be cheated again but now we are really convinced and feel hopeful with our strawberry-nose by this ad.  I repeat several times in my mind with confidence and smile that "face to your fate,"just like what the girl does on this ad.