Language Review (1):
Proper Sentence Structure, Conciseness
Words and Parts of Speech
Types of Error
(& Correction Symbols)
Examples and Related Web Pages
Sp  Error in spelling 2. The jacuzi and other forms of facility all contributes to make our lifestyle a better one. 
The Jacuzzi and other facilities all contribute to make our lifestyle a better one.
(a military facility; sports facilities)
Article A good advertisement has become an important means to attract them…
Noun: Singular/Plural
As long as people can perceive in their daily life the existence of love, the tenderness and warmth brought along will mend all the harms caused by the frustration and difficulty we encounter time after time. (s/pswitch in pronoun)
As long as people can feel love, as well as its tenderness and warmth, they will feel less harmed by the frustrations and difficulties in life.
D  Faulty diction
or ww 
and usage
wrong word; wrong word usage-- see dictionary 
I conjecture this song is written to somewhat complain bitterly and sadly about people and the society.  (Tense?)
I think the song complains bitterly and sadly about human indifference.
For the watch, the three watch entwine together seems to be dancing in the midair with the woman dancing inside one of the watches.  (SS--two verbs, noun--singular/plural; rep.) 
  In the watch ad, the three watches, entertwined and circling in midair, surround the woman who poses or dances in a delicate balance in the middle. 
few, little, notice, (I had to notice that my poses were graceful and correct:chin up and chest out.)
wc poor word choice 
From the comparison above, we can see that the three ads all try to establish a 
relationship between the richness of the woman figure with the products they are advocating.
... they are promoting. 
He advocates the return of capital punishment.

Clauses & Syntax:

Types of Error
(& Correction Symbols)
Examples and Related Web Pages
SS Faulty sentence structure As I know a beautiful song, I just remember its wonder melody without reading its lyrics.
As listening to a beautiful song, I would only remember its wonderful melody without reading its lyrics.
  While listening to a beautiful song, I would only remember its wonderful melogy without reading its lyrics.
frag  Fragment
cs comma splice
The narrator may have some expectations of this beautiful city at first, but he is disappointed in the people of the city, how superficial they are after he took his walk around the city.
The narrator might have some expectations of this beautiful city at first, but he was disappointed at the people of the city after he took his walk around the city and found that they were superficial.

The stereotype of the seaside towns are like neon lights all glittering around the promenade, people all dress fashionably, as if walking out from the beauty magazines, all chatting and feasting, enjoying their life. It is as if in a never-ending carnival.
  What are the images we have of a seaside summer resort?  It may be promenades and restaurants glittering with neon lights.  Or fashionable people, chatting and feasting beautifully as if they were in a beauty magazine or a never-ending carnival. 

The melody of this song is slow, the tone of the singers transmits a kind of sad and lone mixed feeling. 
The melody of this song is slow, the tone of the singer sad and lonely. 
ll  Lack of parallelism
//		   Many newlyweds were attracted by it and chose it (a restaurant) as the setting for their wedding pictures.
  Attracted by it, many newlyweds chose it (a restaurant) as the setting for their wedding pictures.
Question Why the printer chooses this animal, lion, but not some other animals?
Why does the printer choose this animal, lion, but not some other
kinds?
R-O  Run-on; or over-use of and run-on sentence; fused sentence 
We can see a pig-like man sitting on a bench with a lion costume and a
lion headgear is put on the bench. (Vag)
We can see a pig-like man sitting on a bench in a lion costume
with a lion headgear besides him. 
In the first picture, "The Confession of a Mask," we can see a pig-like man sit on a bench in a lion costume, while his lion headgear is put besides him on the bench.
Logic + conjunctives
Perfumes are not only produced for women anymore.  However, men need fragrances to attract the opposite sex as well, besides a good smell can also become a symbol of gentle.
Perfumes are no longer  produced for women only.  Men need fragrances to show their gentility, or to attract the opposite sex as well.

Style:

Types of Error
(& Correction Symbols)
Examples and Related Web Pages
sequence of action When customers came in, I had to lead them to a suitable table and serving them with hot towels, water, introducing the menu for them etc.  Then if the customers order wines, Ihad to prepare for wineglasses, too. 
  When the customers came in, I lead them to a suitable table, served them with hot towels and water, introduced the menu, and took their orders.  If the customers order wine, I prepared wineglasses for them, too. 
Wdy  Wordy
  The basic pattern in Discovery's ads is monochromatic background, a typical slogan on the top of its ads, a picture, and then followed with its topic, finally, on the bottom of the ads is Discovery's mark.
  The basic pattern of Discovery's ads is: over a monochromatic background and from top bottom, a typical slogan, a humorous picture, some catch phrases, and then Discovery's logo.

  More than getting to know a lot of people from other countries, he also tasted all kinds of typical delicious foods which were provided by all the groups. 
  Besides getting to know a lot of people from other countries, he also tasted all kinds of ethnic foods provided by all the groups.    (or special foods characteristic of the various cultural groups in the festival.) 

  To be honest, I was interested in this part-time job, which sounded challenging to me, when I heard about his experiences.   . . . That job really sounded challenging to me.  Thus, I decided to apply for it. 
  When I heard about his experience, I was interested in this challenging job, and decided to apply for it.   
Awk   He is my boss in the office, and we fell in love last year because of having similar interests and much time to get along with him. (s/p)
  He is my boss.  We fell in love last year because we have similar interests and a lot of time to get along with each other.